


Chin Up

by jeejaschocolate



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Anal Fingering, Canon Disabled Character, Canon Divergence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Food Porn, M/M, Mommy Issues, Porn with Feelings, Praise Kink, Rare Pairings, Safe Sane and Consensual, top!Ignis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-19
Updated: 2017-03-19
Packaged: 2018-10-07 17:56:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10366221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jeejaschocolate/pseuds/jeejaschocolate
Summary: (Written for a prompt in the kinkmeme)Ignis has always been the best caregiver in the group. Possibly the best in all of Lucis. Or anywhere.Some people need to be mothered more than others.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by a post on the kinkmeme that went like this:  
> "Listen, we know Ravus has some serious mommy problems. I don't even care how it happens, but I want Ignis to show him all the motherly affection he's been missing. Someone needs to care for that boy.
> 
> ++++++ If you can somehow work lactation into this."
> 
> This post lit a burning fiery need in me and I (wisely, yes very wisely indeed) pulled an all-nighter on this fic. So, this is the fill, minus the male lactation. Not because I don't like the kink (it actually works for me), but because I couldn't find a way to work it into the story. I wanted real-talk mommy kink and Ravus is the perfect guy to get us there :) 
> 
> Thank you for this anon!!
> 
> Note on the AU: Yeah, I fucked with the canon, and it makes no sense. Whatever. Basically things get solved somewhere in between chapter 8 and 9. So hooray! 
> 
> Now time for pron.

_It wasn’t that he missed her. Not constantly, at least. Not in an active, always-at-the-front-of-his-mind kind of way. It wasn’t even that he needed more time to grieve—well, more than the complete lack of a bereavement period he had been afforded in his youth._

_(No time to grieve when there was a war going on, when the Imperial Army was literally on top of you, threatening to kill you and your sister at the slightest misstep. Nothing to do in those times except let a part of yourself die and become the most powerful thing in the room; in this case, part of the army that killed your own mother.)_

_But no. This feeling had nothing to do with the known kind of sadness and regret that came from losing a member of your family. Ravus had read about grief in books. He wasn’t an uneducated man. He knew that he was supposed to feel something like sadness having lost his mother._

_But to say sadness…to say that he just “missed” her…neither of these came close to describing his feelings. Ravus felt that a part of him—some pure, wonderful part—had been ripped out the day his mother died. Maybe it was because she died in front of him, because he saw her slaughtered. Regardless, the person he was before and the man he became after the day she died were two completely different entities. Born from the same woman, but made separately._

_He was not whole. He knew that. It was a part of his reality. Instead of being a complete man, there would always be a gaping hole inside of him where she had once been. He could feel it. That hole, as much as his pride and ambition, was a part of him now. It shaped who he was as a person._

_He would never be whole._

_________________________________________________________

Ravus tapped his fingers against the arms of the ornate wooden chair he found himself sitting in. Tenebraen wood, he noted, with no small amount of distaste. This whole room, the royal dining room inside the newly rebuilt Insomnia Citadel, was littered with fineries from his home kingdom. Tapestries threaded with Tenebraen silk, sylleblossom-leafed fruit bowls. Even a statue dedicated to the line of the Oracle.

Garish, to put it mildly.

Exactly how long was the prince going to make him wait? 

No, _king,_ he corrected himself. Noctis was king now, after Regis…fell (he preferred not to remember the specifics, as his prosthetic always seemed to spark annoyingly against the blunted stump of his right arm every time he did so). But yes, fates and the Six behold, Noctis had done it. Without even breaking a sweat, really. Yes, one sweep of power from the Astrals combined with the ethereal power of the Ring had been enough to purge the darkness from Insomnia. No need for the crystal’s magic after all.

Ardyn had been pissed, but he was long gone now. Ravus was reunited with his sister in Altissia, before Lunafreya could make the mistake of awakening the Hydraen. Instead, Ravus saw to it that she met with Noctis first and the union between Oracle and Chosen One caused an unprecedented alliance of powers. The skies themselves shifted and Noctis was elevated to his prophesied status, sweeping away the Starscourge at once. 

All thanks to his sister, Ravus added. Whom the king would soon be marrying. Of course. It’s what Luna wanted in the first place. 

But with times of peace came responsibilities. Ravus himself was being lauded as a hero, the man with the foresight to bring the Oracle together with the Chosen One before it was too late. He hardly thought he had done anything worth celebrating—more like following his sister’s wishes as closely as possible—but it afforded him a new position of power as a liaison between the old Imperial Army (what was now merely a remnant of Niflheim) and the newly reinstated kingdom of Lucis. 

Ravus would take it. Why not. He was basically running the place now that Versatel had been overthrown. Besides, he needed to be there for his sister. Lunafreya would need someone looking out for her in these foreign lands—even if Lucis was to become her new home.

The thought of that, of their Tenebraen homeland being minus one Oracle, minus one Luna, for the foreseeable future, made Ravus heave a deep sigh. What was to become of Fleuret manor? What was to become of their memories there…? 

A knock at the door startled Ravus out of his deep thought. He sat up straighter and turned to face the incoming party.

First, a short-haired man walked in. Ravus knew him; he was Cor Leonis. Hard to miss. Behind him walked Noctis, with his typically unconfident gait. It seemed that becoming king had done nothing for his posture, at least. 

Cor nodded to Ravus in a respectful but informal greeting. Noctis met his gaze solidly. They sat themselves down at the table and exchanged pleasantries.

Noctis seemed on edge. He kept glancing at the door every few moments, letting Cor do most of the talking. Ravus purposefully tried to address the king several times, only to receive curt one-word answers that would have driven the Imperial officer absolutely mad years ago.

As it was, Ravus was losing his patience. Fast. He looked at Noctis—still a _boy_ , even if he was to be called king—and hated him. He had _always_ hated this boy. With his flawless face. Shielded from the world so perfectly his whole life—Regis had chosen _him_ over Ravus—and now handed the throne on an Astral platter.

This child—this _infant_ —was going to marry his sister. And he couldn’t even look Ravus in the eye for more than a second.

Ravus set his jaw straight, his prosthetic limb gripping hard enough to leave marks in the armrest. Cor eyed him warily, knowing what would come next.

“Your highness,” Ravus hissed slowly. “If this is not a good time for us discuss the future of our nations, then I will come back another day. But I can assure you, here and now, that I’ve no intention of sitting here while your mind entertains other thoughts—”

Then came another knock at the door. This one, Ravus had not anticipated. He whipped around and saw another man let himself into the room. A bespectacled man pushing a cart of sandwiches before him, handling the door and the cart with singlehanded ease. A butler or…a servant?

But no, Ravus recognized this man too. He was one of Noctis’s party members. The royal advisor. 

He would never forget those sharp green eyes—masquerading behind glasses as pedestrian, but in reality those eyes scanned everything in the nearby vicinity for weak spots and hidden meanings. Ravus instinctively knew to be wary of him. His name? Something…Scientia…?

“Ignis!” Noctis called to him, almost leaping out of his chair. “There you are. Come, join us.” 

The king looked visibly relieved at the sight of his advisor. Cor sighed and nodded to himself, as if he had been expecting this. 

“My apologies if I kept you waiting, your majesty,” Ignis began, rolling the sandwich cart next to the long table where they were all seated. “It seems the kitchens are a bit backed up at the moment, what with preparations for tonight’s gala. So I took the liberty of personally preparing you gentlemen some lunch. It would do nicely to have a bit of light nourishment while we…discuss.” 

Ravus noted that there were three plates on the cart. Ignis picked one and served the king first. The advisor smiled warmly at Noctis while he set the plate down in front of him, murmuring something to his royal charge out of earshot.

A pang of…something…reverberated within Ravus as he watched their exchange. Noctis seemed almost like a different person with Ignis nearby, happier and lighter, eagerly eyeing the sandwich and nodding to his advisor in quick agreement. 

There was something between them, Ravus realized in a flash. Obviously. Were they lovers…?

But they didn’t seem like lovers. There was…a different edge to their exchange. Noctis was a delighted boy all of a sudden, while Ignis seemed to be even more adult by comparison. Well, for the love of the Astrals, Noctis looked like a coddled child next to his doting—

The omnipresent hole inside Ravus twitched as the picture came into focus. He remembered, suddenly, that Noctis also lost his mother as a child. But the prince always had maids and servants to take up the slack.

It seemed Ignis had taken up quite a bit of that slack, perhaps much more than the others.

“So, garulessa steak for you, your highness,” Ignis continued at a louder volume, one they all could hear. “Since you seem to have grown fond of it since our road trip. And for you, Marshal…” He set down a separate plate in front of Cor. “A traditional BLT, the Crown City favorite.”

His green eyes turned to Ravus and the Imperial officer visibly flinched under their penetrating gaze. Ignis smiled politely and rolled the cart closer to him. 

“For you, Imperial Highness Fleuret,” the advisor began, gently placing a plate in front of Ravus. “Some Tenebraen wood-fried salmon.”

Ravus could feel Ignis’s presence like a softly burning campfire, warm but not deadly. Crackling with light and heat. He fought down a shiver as Ignis’s arm came close to his own. 

“I hope it’s to your liking,” Ignis went on. “I picked up this recipe in Altissia. It seems to be well-received by Lucian standards, but I’d love to hear a critique from a Tenebraen native as well. To improve upon perfection, if you will.”

Ravus glanced up at Ignis, mismatched eyes gone wide. His mind raced as he tried to figure out what the hell to make of this man. Was he a snake in the grass, luring Ravus with unasked-for kindness only to spring a trap later? Was he a dullard? Impossible. Then was he…just a man who loved to cook? 

That sandwich smelled heavenly. The scent wafted up to Ravus’s nostrils on its own, tinged with a memory the Imperial officer had not touched since—

While Ravus’s thoughts spun out of control, Noctis continued their meeting. “Thoughtful as always, Ignis,” the king said, helping himself to a mouthful of food. “Now please, have a seat.” 

Ignis nodded in response. “Certainly.” 

The normally distant heart in Ravus’s chest thundered manically as he followed Ignis’s movements with his eyes. He watched Ignis pull a can of Ebony from the sandwich cart and then sit down at the table, brandishing a notepad and pen from somewhere (the king’s Armiger…?). 

“Just Ebony for you, then?” Cor asked with a chuckle. He tucked into his sandwich with relaxed effort. 

Since when was the Immortal ever relaxed? Was this the effect of Ingis’s cooking? Ravus eyed his own ‘personally prepared’ dish warily. He dared not take a bite.

“This is all I require.” Ignis’s eyes twinkled as he took a hearty swig of Ebony. “Now, I believe you gentlemen were discussing a new delineation of borders within the Cartanica region?” 

“Yes, it’s a more complicated matter than it seems,” Cor answered wearily. “The people of Cartanica are loathe to accept any form of Lucian governance at the moment and we’ve been at a roadblock with their Secretary.”

Ravus took stock of himself while the conversation went on around him. Actually it was a trivial matter, easy to solve once the people of Cartanica realized what they stood to gain in trade through the new borderlines, but Ravus could not bring himself to add anything at the moment. He did not trust his voice to speak in its normal tone. 

He looked down at his hands, one prosthetic, one human. He felt suddenly clunky and awkward, like his body did not fit in with the grandiose, proper environment of this room. He glanced at Noctis, looking more kingly now that he had his advisor by his side, bidding Ignis to speak and turning the conversation into a beneficial one easily. He saw Cor, a living legend, a statuesque man.

And Ignis…

Ignis was not looking at him. Was he…offended somehow by Ravus’s presence? Did he hold a grudge because of the incident with the Kingsglaive? Worry, guilt, and shame bubbled up within Ravus. He suddenly thought he should apologize for something. For what, he was not certain. But he was clearly the odd man out here…

Maybe if he could show that he had some remnants of decency left then these men would acknowledge him. Then Ignis would be able to look at him—not as an enemy or a burden, but as someone they could converse with easily. 

All at once, he realized he wanted Ignis to look at him again. From somewhere deep in his stomach, he wished hard that those green eyes would fall to him—

“And of course, it speaks to your character that you’re here today discussing these matters with us, Imperial Highness.”

It happened. Ravus gasped when Ignis looked back at him, smiling again in that polite way. But he thought…well he couldn’t be sure, but…Ravus thought he saw a glimmer of fondness in Ignis’s gaze. 

A shiver, like the echo of a harsh scream, tore through that gaping maw inside of Ravus. That place. It had not ached like this in many, many years—

“That’s right,” Noctis chimed in. “Have we ever properly thanked you for what you did in Altissia that day, Ravus?” 

Heat flushed through the Imperial officer. Now they were all looking at him. With gratitude, even. When had that happened…?

“…Tsk…” Ravus made a sound like he was displeased, but really, the sound came from his tongue unsticking to the roof of his mouth. 

How undignified. But he could not bring himself to say anything. The moment lingered on in uncomfortable silence until Cor spoke up.

“Well, if the matter is settled then I’ll take my leave,” he announced. He nodded to everyone in goodbye. “Ignis. Noctis, your majesty. Imperial officer, Ravus. Good day.” 

When the door shut behind Cor, Noctis and Ignis shared a brief look. Ravus zoomed in on the look like a hawk, trying to decipher its meaning. But before he could begin to decode, Noctis was already speaking.

“I’ll call for someone to clean up these plates…”

“No, no, your majesty.” Ignis stood up at once. “The waiting staff is quite busy downstairs. And it’s just a few plates, I don’t mind clearing them.” He went around collecting the empty sandwich dishes and placing them gracefully back on the cart. 

When he came to Ravus, the advisor stopped short. “Was everything…suitable, your Imperial Highness? You…haven’t touched your lunch.” 

Ravus blinked and realized he had not spared the sandwich so much as a second glance. He couldn’t, it was way too dangerous, but…

He looked back up at Ignis and saw a worried line creasing the middle of the man’s forehead. His eyes drooped down at the corners in something like disappointment. 

Automatically, Ravus reached for the food. He couldn’t let that look stand—he just couldn’t!

Steeling himself, he took a small bite of the salmon sandwich. Saliva rushed to the front of his mouth. The bread was soft, the garnishing vegetables crisp and fresh. The fish meat was still warm, imbued with that smoky flavor that tasted exactly like…something _she_ used to make. Everything from her had tasted like this. Warm, with a hint of fire and spice. Like nature and…love. 

Before Ravus knew what was happening, there was wetness in his eyes. 

He dropped the sandwich onto the plate in shock. Catching himself at the very last moment, Ravus turned his head from both Noctis and Ignis. He let his white hair fall forward, shielding his reddened face from view like a curtain. 

“Is it…to your liking, Imperial Highness?” Ignis asked softly. 

It was unnaturally good. Hardly of this world. The taste, everything about it, shook Ravus to his core. Food had never done this to him before. 

Unable to say anything, he nodded once. Safely hidden behind his hair. 

Ignis placed one gloved hand on Ravus’s shoulder. Startled by the touch, Ravus turned around and looked the other man in the face without thinking. By the gods, was his face even presentable? At all? He didn’t know.

But Ignis kept his hand there. He was looking at Ravus with kind eyes. Not mentioning anything about Ravus’s appearance, he said only, “I can make that dish for you again, if you like. Just say the word.” 

Then—Ignis winked at Ravus. It took many moments for the Imperial officer to be certain that’s what did happen. But there was no mistaking it. That man—the royal advisor, the man who had Ravus in pieces over nothing but a sandwich—winked conspiratorially at him. Not overly flirty or mockingly, not with any ulterior motive that Ravus could detect. Just…private. Like that little wink was only for Ravus. 

Their secret.

With that, Ignis turned back to the king. He said loudly, “Perhaps, once I leave, you and the Imperial Highness can discuss _things._ ” 

When Ignis’s hand slid away from him, Ravus felt like he might slide to the floor in turn. Hardly anything left holding him up. He watched Ignis leave with a throbbing feeling in his chest.

Unaware of anything that had just happened, Noctis cleared his throat. He said a lot after that. Things of a heart-to-heart kind of nature, about how he felt getting married to Luna. Some…other things. Ravus honestly could not remember what. But he was sure he said something appropriate in response. …Probably, anyway. 

He left the citadel that day on unsteady legs. 

________________________________________________________

It took him several days to sort out what exactly happened there. Once he realized the truth—what he must have looked like from an outsider’s perspective—he was furious with himself. Naturally.

How could he have let that happen?! How could he have just let those Lucians steamroll him? All they did was make him some food! 

How could he have been so blindsided by nothing but a…retainer? Ignis was barely more than a servant! Ravus was stronger than him, physically and probably mentally too. Stronger in every way and yet…and yet…

Ravus could still feel the advisor’s hand on his shoulder. On his human shoulder. The warmth from Ignis’s hand had never fully left him. He tried not to touch it with his other hand, the prosthetic one, because he knew on some level that…he wanted the feeling to stay there. 

And so it did. Even after showering, after inevitably having to wash his body (which he had learned to do one-handed), he could still feel Ignis’s gloved touch. There was more to that touch then a mere passing of hands. Ravus knew that. 

There had to be.

When he was alone at night, Ravus let that warmth permeate him deeper. He tried to imagine what it would feel like all over him. What it would feel like to let Ignis touch every inch of him, to take Ignis inside of himself…

He masturbated. Of course. He could hardly do anything else. Coming from just his hand—well, his hand and Ignis’s image planted firmly in his mind—felt way better than it should have. For a moment, he imagined himself whole—it was his favorite way to masturbate, after all. Picturing an emptiness fulfilled after so, so long…and now he had a face to go with that thought…

But when his orgasm subsided, Ravus felt even emptier than before. The reality that he was alone pierced right through him. He felt weak, useless. Like the hole inside of him, the _absence of her_ , was wearing him thin. 

And he had lost weight recently. He did not know why.

Thinking of food, though, only made him think of Ignis. He dared not order his own personal chefs to cook the same dish. 

He knew it would not taste as good.

_______________________________________________________________

The next time Ravus was summoned to the Citadel, he agonized over it. Should he go? He so badly wanted to go. In his heart, the only true want he had was to see Ignis again. 

Sure, he had other wants. He did. Yes, certainly, but…nothing compared to the nagging hunger, the _urge_ to be near Ignis’s warmth again.

He told himself that there was no guarantee he would even see Ignis at the Citadel this time. Then, he berated himself for admitting (even in his own mind) what he wanted. Torn in a million directions, Ravus ultimately decided that he would go.

He had to. For Luna, at the very least.

So, Ravus arrived at the citadel ready to meet with the king. He was ushered in through the main hall, then asked to wait in some kind of antechamber, as Noctis was already in some other meeting. It put Ravus out to be told to wait, but he had little choice in the matter. Grumbling softly, he sat himself down on a plush chair and waited.

Minutes ticked by. Ten, then twenty. Ravus was getting angrier and angrier. He thought about storming out just to prove a point…

Then, without any warning, the door to the antechamber burst open. He expected to see Noctis accompanied by a handful of retainers…but instead, it was only Ignis. Alone.

“Oh, your Imperial Highness!” Ignis broke into a pleased smile as he laid eyes on Ravus. 

Those green eyes, this presence—Ravus felt like he had just been hugged. Had he…? No, Ignis was still firmly on the other side of the room. What was going on in his mind…?

“I was wondering where they stashed you.” Ignis crossed his arms and leaned casually against the doorway. “I’m afraid His Majesty will be busy for at least another hour. He’s been preparing for this meeting for the better part of a month.” 

An hour?! Though Ravus’s mind was working sluggishly, part of him knew that was unacceptable. He frowned and prepared to say something indignant. 

Ignis held up a hand, seeing the Imperial officer’s face. “I know, I know. My apologies. We’ve been sort of…running ragged these past few months, keeping up with meetings and the like. Much to do. But it’s no excuse to leave you waiting, of course. We must seem like bumbling rubes to you.” 

The advisor tilted his head to the side with an apologetic smile. “How about I make you an offer, as recompense, hmm?”

Ravus glanced to the side. He felt himself freezing up. 

“Let me take you to the kitchens. I can prepare a quick lunch for you, something I’m sure you’ll like. And by the time you’re finished with your meal I’m sure His Majesty will be ready for you.” 

More…food? What exactly was this? Were they planning on poisoning him? Ravus’s brain told him to rebuke the offer at once.

However, against his will, his mouth remembered the otherworldly taste of Ignis’s cooking. Again, saliva pooled behind his lips and he had to swallow to keep from drooling. It occurred to him that he had not eaten yet that day…

A harsh pang of hunger struck him. His stomach gurgled audibly—a loud, immodest sound Ravus had could not remember hearing from himself before. He looked nervously up at Ignis, hoping the man had not heard. 

But Ignis stood there smiling wider. He nodded in understanding. “I’ll take that as a yes. Come, follow me. It’s not far to the luncheonette—that’s what I call the kitchen the staff hardly ever uses. It’s more private. I assure you we won’t be bothered.” 

Ignis gestured for Ravus to follow, turning to the side and prattling on about this and that. 

“…Alright…” Ravus realized this was the first word he had spoken to Ignis in…maybe ever?

And it was acquiescence. How…appropriate. 

Accepting defeat against his own mortal flesh, Ravus got up and followed Ignis to the kitchen. He walked a little ways behind the advisor, not entirely comfortable walking alongside him (lest it look like they were…friendly). He noticed that standing up, he was actually a good head taller than Ignis.

It felt weird. In his mind, when he…imagined things…he was always looking up at Ignis. 

But he liked following this man. He liked…being led. He knew Ignis knew where he was going and that made him…excited. In a variety of ways.

Ignis carried on a one-sided conversation the whole time, just filling up the silence. Ravus was grateful for that because he could not bring himself to say anything. Besides, listening to Ignis talk was nice in its own way. Ignis had a nice voice. Ravus appreciated the sound of it. 

When they got to the kitchen, Ignis immediately ushered Ravus into a chair at the counter. The Imperial officer could see why Ignis called this luncheonette: The food preparation area was a grill attached to a bar where people could sit and enjoy drinks or food. It was clean and comfortable. 

Ravus took a seat at the counter, eyeing his surroundings. He felt Ignis staring at him. Unsure what to do, he stared back…for as long as he could, until a feeling blossomed in the air between them. Something like heat and a strange sense of…knowing. Ravus did not know if he should run away from it or bend to his own curiosity and desire. 

Ignis chuckled, setting up some pots and pans. “Good of you to join me for lunch,” he remarked cheerfully. “I have just the thing!” 

Watching Ignis cook was the same as watching any master of their craft get to work on a project. Each ingredient was added fluently and…lovingly. Ignis snapped his fingers several times, as if figuring out new things to add on the fly. Ravus was totally captivated by the sight. Ignis made a wonderful picture, his slim, lithe body moving fluidly throughout the cooking space. Ravus could have watched him for much, much longer. He stopped thinking about how much time was passing, how busy he was in reality.

The smell of cooked fish got better by the second. Soon Ravus could actually feel his stomach growling in anticipation. Before the meal was totally finished, Ignis coaxed Ravus over to the table where he told him to sit “properly.” 

Properly. Ravus swallowed hard as a shiver of arousal snaked down to his groin. He was filled with desire right now, for…all kinds of things.

“There we are.” Ignis plopped a dish full of steaming, aromatic fish over rice in front of Ravus. “Bon appétit.” 

Inhaling deeply, Ravus picked up a knife and fork with shaky hands. This smell, he already knew what it was. Oh yes…unmistakable. But Ignis explained the dish anyway.

“This time it’s smoked trout fillets over a bed of Gralean rice. I took the liberty of adding some Ulwaat berry shavings over the rice, for flavor. I’m told that’s common practice in Tenebrae?”

Ravus’s whole face felt much warmer. “It is…” he said.

Ignis smiled in recognition. “Let me know what you think, then.” He went back to kitchen and made himself a plate of the dish. “I believe I’ll join you this time.” 

The advisor took his time laying his napkin across his lap and arranging his silverware and glassware. He removed his gloves meticulously and put them in his breast pocket. Ravus watched every move in fascination.

“Don’t hold back on my account,” Ignis said, noticing Ravus’s stare. “Please, enjoy your meal.” 

Seeing the honest, open look on Ignis’s face (mixed with a hint of urgency), Ravus scooped some food onto his fork. Feeling Ignis watching him, he wrapped his mouth around the utensil. Familiar flavors washed down his throat, throughout all of Ravus’s senses. He closed his eyes. Oh yes, fresh and warm, just made…

A memory of eating this same dish, years and years ago, popped into his mind. Luna at his side, sitting at a picnic table in Tenebrae. There was a woman there serving them. She was bright like sun and warm like the food they ate…

Ravus had to bite back a moan as he swallowed. This dish was truly heavenly, as he expected. 

Forgetting about Ignis for a moment, Ravus lost himself to the wonderful process of feeding himself. He went a little faster than usual, but made sure to take his time savoring every bite. This meal was more than a lunch. It was sustenance. It was a memory made real, made better somehow because he could enjoy it again in real time. When he felt the food hit his stomach, his whole body seemed to unfurl a little in comfort. 

When he was finished, scraping the dish clean, he just sat for a moment. Collected himself. Some voice in the back of his head told him that at least he hadn’t cried this time. 

“…It makes me very happy to see you enjoy your food.” 

Ravus’s mismatched eyes turned sharply to Ignis. The man was sitting there looking as content as Ravus had ever seen him. A full smile on his face this time, not just a coy smirk. 

He looked like he was being honest.

Ravus glanced down nervously at his empty plate. “Th… Thank you for…making this dish. For me.” 

“You’re quite welcome. I daresay we should make it a habit of meeting for lunches like this.” Ignis sighed and looked back at Ravus with a slight frown. “At least a few times a month. You’re looking…rather thin, Imperial Highness. Thinner than when I last saw you. Are you eating properly in Tenebrae?” 

Of course Ignis was correct in his assumption. Ravus could not remember the last time he had full meal in him, certainly not one that felt this satisfying. He stayed quiet, unable to lie to Ignis’s face and tell him he was fine. And well, that he was a grown man, and why exactly was Ignis so interested in his personal life anyway…? But suddenly none of those arguments made any sense. 

Ignis’s concern seemed genuine. Ravus had a difficult time judging people’s true motives, but he knew when he was being played. He knew from the moment he met Ardyn that the man was taking him for a fool. Pure and simple. But Ignis? There was not even a hint of that malice. 

It seemed this was just what Ignis did. He was…a caregiver. This was his natural state. 

…Could there be a person that magnificent? Ravus wondered.

“Hmm.” Ignis made an unsatisfied sound. He rose to his feet. “Here, let me have a look at you.”

Without waiting for an answer, he walked to Ravus’s side and a hand on his shoulder again. This time, Ravus knew the feeling it would give him and he braced himself for it. But still, that mind-numbing aura of gentleness…it was firmer this time. Ignis was being more forceful in his touching.

Ravus had to swallow another moan. His face was so close to Ignis’s chest. He wanted to bury his face right up against the buttons on this man’s shirt, right over his heart. He wanted to feel his warmth all over his face. He wanted to smell him, intimately. He wanted to take that little necklace Ignis wore into his mouth and suck on the metal, absorbing a piece of this man’s energy into himself.

He wanted, he wanted.

Ignis squeezed the bones in Ravus’s shoulder. “Yes, your bones are more prominent here than last time. And your cheeks are looking a bit more hollow.” 

As if collecting data, Ignis ran the back of his pointer finger down Ravus’s cheek. The Imperial officer flinched and sucked in air, making a sound between a whimper and a gasp. 

Moving on like he hadn’t heard (though he must have heard that humiliating noise, they were close enough), Ignis continued tutting. “Tsk. What are they feeding you in Tenebrae? Need I go to Fleuret manor myself and have a word with your personal chefs?” 

_Yes, please, come with me…_ Ravus shouted inside his mind. He so badly wanted Ignis to come with him to the manor. He even wanted to watch Ignis chew out his chefs, even though he knew it wasn’t their fault. He wanted to see Ignis go into his own kitchen and completely take control, to put Ravus on a personal diet and monitor it himself.

He wanted Ignis to take care of him like that. He would let this man dictate his every move. Oh, by the Six, he would.

Ravus opened his mouth to say something, uncertain what would come out. He wanted to plead with Ignis to come back to Tenebrae with him. He was already running through a list of things in his mind that he could offer this man in compensation. 

But Ignis interrupted his train of thought. “Alas, it’s impossible for me to leave Lucis right now. Noctis is in sore need of an advisor in these early stages of his reign.” 

_Noctis._ The _brat_. Ravus narrowed his eyes in frustration and (he would admit this) jealousy. 

“Now, don’t be cross,” Ignis chided. His hand moved back and he combed his fingers through Ravus’s thin white hair. “I’ll think of a solution. After all, something must be done. They are doing an _abysmal_ job of looking after you in Tenebrae.” 

Ravus closed his eyes against the feel of Ignis’s fingers against his scalp. His stomach did the most amazing somersault and the skin across his whole body seemed to heave a collective sigh. A soothing hand in his hair…the emptiness inside of him yawned for a moment, then closed. He needed that hand there. A palm on the crown of his head, touching him softly. 

Just like hers…

Ravus stuttered a weighty sigh. He felt some measure of agony leaving him the more Ignis touched him. He wanted Ignis to keep his hand there forever…

“Well, at the very least…” Ignis leaned in close and all but whispered in Ravus’s ear. “…I’m certain we could find more reasons for you to visit the Citadel. At least, more official reasons we can float by His Majesty. Now, can’t we?” 

The feel of Ignis’s soft breath tickling his cheek made Ravus want to collapse on the floor and offer himself up. Completely. He would have agreed to anything in that moment. 

Ravus nodded dumbly. 

Ignis broke into a smile. “Yes, of course we can. I’ve just come up with several while we were sitting here. So, not to worry. It’s all handled, your Imperial Highness….may I call you Ravus?” 

The sound of his name in Ignis’s mouth made Ravus’s body light up. He was suddenly aware of a strange pain between his legs. Slowly, he realized it was from his own hardness. His member was hard enough to actually hurt. When had he ever been…like this? 

Growing dizzy (possibly from lack of blood flowing to his brain), Ravus nodded silently again. Yes, Ignis could call him by his given name. _Only that, please._

“Excellent.” Ignis leaned forward and pressed a light kiss to the side of Ravus’s cheek. 

“…Anh…!” Those lips on him! Wet and warm, just like….! 

“Of course, I’ll address you properly when we’re in front of the others. But between us, I’ll call you…” Ignis’s hazel eyes sparkled like gems. “…Ravus.” 

The Imperial officer thought he was about to lose his mind. He felt…wet, down there. Like his cock was dripping already. Could that be? How was it possible to be this aroused, from so little…? 

Ignis moved back a bit, creating some space between them. He glanced down at Ravus’s lap and stared for a moment. Of course, he had to see the obvious bulge there. The insistent, unthinkable arousal Ravus was feeling. No way the Imperial officer could hide it. He thought the advisor might make some snide comment—he had a right to, this situation was beyond inappropriate. So he braced himself for a stab of humiliation.

But instead, Ignis flicked his eyes back to Ravus’s face. “You have a lovely name, Ravus. Quite endearing. Whoever gave it to you must have loved you very much.” 

At that, Ravus had to squeeze his eyes shut against a rush of emotion. He could suddenly hear a woman’s voice in his ears, as clear as day. Her voice, saying his name. 

_Ravus, my darling…_

He remembered now, he remembered what he used to call her…

Suddenly, they both heard footsteps approaching the kitchen. 

“Ah,” Ignis said in a normal voice. “That would be a messenger from His Majesty. I believe it’s time for your meeting now.” 

Calm as ever, Ignis stepped away from Ravus. He leaned back casually against the kitchen counter, arms crossed as if they had just been having a conversation. Ravus unconsciously reached for the other man with one hand, his body trying to follow him. 

Ignis acknowledged the hand with a smile. He gripped it tightly for a moment, then tucked Ravus’s hand down into the officer’s lap. He patted Ravus’s hand one more time for good measure. As if to say, ‘Yes. But later.’

Ravus got the message loud and clear. He held onto that thought tightly in the core of his being, needing to believe Ignis would touch him again. Soon. Not now, but soon.

Sure enough, a maid entered the room not long after. She told Ignis that Noctis wanted to see him now and that he would meet with Ravus in a matter of minutes. Thanking the young girl, Ignis followed her back to the main hall, out of the kitchen. He glanced back at Ravus and nodded once, smiling warmly. 

It took all of Ravus’s willpower not to get down on his hands and knees and crawl after him. He wanted to, but…he needed to be patient. He couldn’t embarrass Ignis over something like this. No…he wanted to make Ignis happy. To do as he said.

That night though, after meeting with Noctis, Ravus stayed around the castle. He found out where Ignis usually worked and he waited for the man outside in the corridor. His brain was still working—or at least, he thought it was—but it could not come up with any reasons not to do this. 

No one…no one had ever made Ravus feel…like that. 

Finally, Ignis emerged from his office. As he walked by, Ravus loudly came up beside him. He didn’t want to startle Ignis, so he gave the man plenty of time to recognize his footsteps. 

Fortunately, they were alone. 

Ravus grabbed Ignis by the shoulder and pulled him into a nook, unseen by any potential passersby. Bending down, Ravus kissed Ignis hard on the mouth. He kissed him over and over, pressing their mouths together until he could taste Ignis all the way in the back of his throat. 

He wanted this to be his answer, since whenever he came near Ignis no words seemed to come out. He would just have to show him in actions then. 

Ravus eventually pulled back to get some air. He looked down at the man he so adored, thinking he would kiss him again—but Ignis appeared a bit disheveled. The advisor’s face was flushed, glasses slightly askew. The normally calm man seemed more than a little…bewildered.

But, after a moment, Ignis took it in stride. He adjusted his glasses with one hand and regarded Ravus with a fond expression. 

“Well, now. Here we are.” 

The Imperial officer preened. 

_____________________________________________________________

And so it was. They began a sort of clandestine relationship. Ignis did indeed invent reasons for Ravus to be present in the Citadel. From things like “discussing the subdivision of the Imperial navy,” a worthy subject, to things as trivial as “overseeing the creation of the new Niflheim calendar.” Some ideas were better than others, admittedly. 

But they found a way to be together. Ignis always came through, maneuvering time in his luncheonette space that they could have alone together. Ravus loved when Ignis made him meals. Partly because Ignis was a phenomenal cook, but also because Ignis always coddled him after the meal. 

If there was even a speck of food left over on Ravus’s face, the advisor would tut and give Ravus a look of extreme patience. Then he would calmly approach the Imperial officer and tell him, “Chin up,” which meant that Ravus needed to raise his face so Ignis could wipe his mouth. Gently, always gently. 

Sometimes Ravus made sure to eat messily—something he normally never did—just so he could have the satisfaction of Ignis cleaning him off afterwards. Dusting crumbs off his shirt, licking a napkin to get a stain off his face, washing Ravus’s hands in the sink if they were filled with sauce. 

Needless to say, Ravus loved being handled by Ignis. He did not like being messy, but part of the satisfaction was being cleaned to perfection afterwards no matter what. He could rely on Ignis for that. 

He could rely on Ignis for all kinds of things. They learned together. 

Which was how they came to the night Ravus would never come back from. 

By this time, Ravus and Ignis had shared a certain level of intimacy. But Ignis was always far too gentle with Ravus. He still had not fucked the officer properly, choosing instead to tuck him into bed, kiss his forehead, and soundly jerk him off. Ignis was also nearly perfect at giving hand jobs. He brought Ravus to shattering orgasm almost every night they were together. 

Which Ravus loved, but he also wanted to be fucked.

Badly. 

He wanted the part of Ignis that filled the absence inside of himself, and he also wanted Ignis the man. That fucking sexy man Ravus wanted all to himself. He was not good at sharing to begin with, nor compromising, and there was no way he would ever settle for less than Ignis’s everything. 

Eventually Ravus just told him—with simple words: “Please, Ignis, I want you to fuck me. I need it…will you…do that for me?” 

And of course he knew Ignis would do it (especially if Ravus asked so nicely). Ignis had a hard time saying no to Ravus in general. But then, once Ignis found that Ravus was technically a virgin in the “being fucked” department, the advisor had a completely different idea.

“We’re going to do this slowly,” Ignis announced that night. “By my call.” 

Biting his lip to keep from screaming in frustration and need, Ravus got naked on all fours as he was instructed. He wanted Ignis to just take him already… 

But, of course, Ignis was right after all. Ravus had never played with his ass properly and the process of preparing the officer took quite a long time. Ignis lubed up his lover to the extreme and stuck in one finger at a time, painstakingly, pulling back if Ravus showed even the slightest bit of pain. 

Yes, having Ignis’s ungloved fingers inside of him felt ridiculously good. But Ravus’s asshole was pretty tight, and they needed to “do things in the proper order,” according to Ignis. 

Regardless, with two fingers in his ass, bent forward on his chest, presenting himself to Ignis, Ravus began to lose it. Ignis’s fingers were slim and precise, rubbing against his inner walls and against the rim of him. Arching up into the farther depths of him then pulling back at a curious angle, one that set Ravus’s body on fire. Pressing into him _just so_ , reaching a hand around to his front to slow jerk him off in that calculated way he had (twisting his fist at first, then stroking, rubbing his thumb along the slit of Ravus’s cock—exactly how Ravus liked it). 

Ravus began to moan, feeling his hips push back against Ignis’s fingers. He wanted more…

“Oh…more…Ignis, more…” he groaned, digging his fingers into the soft bed beneath them. 

“As you wish.” 

Ignis inserted a third finger into him. At that, Ravus cried out. He felt stretched farther than he had ever been in his life (he shuddered to think what an actual dick felt like). It burned, but it felt…so good.

He felt himself opening. Opening for Ignis. 

“That’s it, my dear,” Ignis crooned, scissoring his fingers slowly. “You’re getting there.” 

“Nnnh…” Ravus groaned. He loved being praised by Ignis. It was the thing that worked the most for him, out of everything.

And Ignis knew that. “You’re doing so well,” the advisor cooed, “Fucking yourself on my fingers, just like that. Can you take a little more, do you think?”

Ravus nodded wildly, his white hair flying in all directions.

Dear gods, what was happening to him? Those smooth digits dancing along nerves he had never explored before…Ravus felt his cock throbbing in Ignis’s hand. His climax was rapidly approaching and he could not fucking believe it. He was going to come, like this?

“Yes, of course you can,” Ignis continued softly, pressing deeper inside Ravus. “Because you’re good like that. So good at taking me, aren't you?” 

“….Yes!” The friction, right there! There was something there, right in that spot…! 

Tremors ran through Ravus’s body, over and over. A clear sign he was about to come. 

Ignis curled his fingers against that spot, seeing the reaction it got from his lover. He jabbed right into Ravus’s sweet spot again and again. It had been part of his plan all along to get Ravus to come on his fingers first, just to get his body amenable to the idea of having something in his ass. 

And the yields were better than expected. Ravus’s composure was dissolving into thin air. 

The officer felt a blinding orgasm building inside of him, coming from somewhere between his ass and cock and everywhere else. It was too much pleasure. Way, way too much. 

“Mm…!” Ravus began. 

He clapped a hand over his mouth, trying to stuff down the word that was about to come out. He couldn’t say it—not here, not now! He was not alone! This was not him at home jerking off to the feeling of filled emptiness, of presence where there used to be absence…

Ignis pulled the officer’s hand away from his mouth. “Don’t, Ravus,” he said softly. Gently still. “Don’t try to push it away. Let yourself feel it.” 

Ah, gods and daemons and everything else, Ravus was about to come! He was open and full of Ignis. Whole. Finally whole.

_No, don’t say it. No…no!_

“Muh… Mommy!!”

Ravus’s body clenched as he prepared for Ignis to get up and leave him. No way any man, not even someone as patient as Ignis, would accept being called _that_ during sex. Was it over…?

Ignis paused for only a fraction of a second. Then, he gathered himself and continued with renewed effort, finger-fucking Ravus and stroking him into a glorious completion. 

“There you go,” Ignis offered, spurring his lover on. “My sweet boy. My special one. Let it out now.” 

Screaming viscerally, Ravus came. He saw nothing for a long time, wrapped up in the sensation of having fingers against his prostate as he reached climax. Words tumbled out of his mouth as he orgasmed, unable to hold anything back. Not even the things he had kept inside of himself for years. 

“I love you Mommy! I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…Mommy…I need you…come back Mommy…I love you…don’t leave me, Mommy…Mama…I want my mama….” 

Slowly, piece by piece, Ravus’s climax subsided. Ignis held him through it, keeping his fingers firmly inside until he felt Ravus’s body relax around him. He was holding Ravus upright by his stomach and asshole. When the officer went limp in his arms, Ignis put him down. As gently as possible. 

He bent forward and whispered several things to Ravus all at once.

“You’re beautiful. I love you, Ravus. I’ll never leave you. Never. Do you understand?” 

Ravus was sobbing quietly into a pillow. He reached out with his prosthetic arm and Ignis grasped it firmly, not even flinching at the unnatural metal. The advisor peppered kisses up and down Ravus’s back, soothing him. 

“Hush, everything's fine now. I’m here.” Ignis paused then said, “…I’m going to take my fingers out, alright?” 

Ravus nodded wordlessly. 

So, Ignis slowly removed his fingers. His lover made a sound, like a mixture between pain, pleasure, disappointment, and surprise. Ignis moved to quickly wrap Ravus in his arms, cradling the young man against his chest. Against his bosom, really. 

“I’m still here,” Ignis assured him, pressing Ravus’s face into his naked chest. “You don’t have to do anything. Just let me clean you.” 

Ravus nodded once, a faraway look in his eyes. 

Ignis reached for a towel he had stashed nearby and gently wiped down his vulnerable lover. Rather thoroughly, removing traces of cum and lube and spit and tears. The officer was not spick and span, not yet, Ravus would need to shower for that. But he was livable. 

Then Ignis laid Ravus down flat on his back. His spindly lover—though he had put on a healthy amount of weight recently, eating Ignis’s cooking—was completely malleable right now. Ignis could move him any which way. So it was time to do what the royal advisor had been waiting for, finally.

He latched onto Ravus’s MT arm. “I’m going to remove this. Just for now, alright?” 

Ravus twitched warily, through his exhaustion. “I usually…sleep with it on…” he explained. But Ignis knew that. He was there with him quite often. 

“I know,” Ignis answered. “Which is why I think you should take a break from wearing it now and then. You need to let the skin underneath breathe every once and a while.” Ignis quickly inspected the arm and found the latches that would release the prosthetic from its hold on what remained of Ravus’s arm. “Is that alright?” 

Always permission, of course.

Slowly, closing his eyes tiredly, Ravus nodded.

So, taking care not to cause any undue harm, Ignis removed the prosthetic. It hissed a little as it came off, and Ravus grunted in sharp pain. 

Sure enough the skin on the end of Ravus’s vestigial limb was red and raw. Scratched and a little bit bruised. Ignis tutted in irritation, having foreseen this and scolding himself for not doing anything sooner. 

“Yes, it’s a bit scraped up here,” Ignis said gently. He ran his hand over the limb, imbuing it with some of his regeneration ability. A green light echoed around Ravus for a moment and the young man sighed at the sudden comfort.

Ignis decided right then to put Ravus on a schedule for wearing and not wearing the prosthetic. Alternating hours of the day should be fine. For now, while Ravus was still quite dependent on it. Eventually he hoped that Ravus would feel comfortable not wearing the prosthetic at all when he was alone with Ignis. 

It could not be healthy to keep all that dark magic next to one’s body for so long, the advisor reasoned.

“Ignis…?” Ravus asked sleepily. “Are you…angry with me…?” 

“Certainly not,” the man replied. 

He tucked himself in next to Ravus, wrapping his arms around the younger man’s body. He loved the way Ravus responded by curling himself closer to Ignis, seeking warmth and protection the other man was happy to provide. 

“Why on Eos would I be angry with you?” Ignis brought his voice down to whisper, stroking Ravus’s hair while he spoke. 

“Because…of _that._ Of…everything, really.” Ravus pushed his face closer to Ignis, tears welling up again. “I don’t know what you get out of this sometimes.” 

Ignis chuckled and kissed the top of Ravus’s head. “Don’t you?” he asked lasciviously. 

Still smirking, Ignis pressed the bulge in his underwear—present since even before the evening had begun—up against Ravus’s stomach. Ravus gasped in response, wrapping his hand around the bulge possessively.

“And _that_ is only part of it,” Ignis explained. He let Ravus keep his hand there, knowing his turn would come in the morning. Perhaps he would teach Ravus how to give a proper blowjob tomorrow…maybe it was time. 

But for now, the advisor turned back to Ravus. The young man had his heterochromatic eyes closed, probably on the edge of sleep. Still, Ignis said what he needed to. “I meant what I said earlier, Ravus. I love you and I’ll never leave you as long as you want me by your side.” 

He kissed each one of Ravus’s closed eyes. “Now, take care not to forget that.” 

 

 

 

The end

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed this one. 
> 
> Many gifts to you anon, and to this great fandom. Y'all keepin on keepin on? 'Course you are ;)


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